Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Is Sean Avery Angry or Just Rude?

View Julie Christiansen's profile on LinkedInThis Just In from Mark Zwolinski SPORTS REPORTER for the Toronto Star:
Even if the Dallas Stars aren't ready to pardon Sean Avery for his behaviour, there are those in the NHL who are slightly more sympathetic.
"North America is all about forgiveness. If you ask, if he (Avery) asks, he'll be back in the NHL," Leafs winger Jamal Mayers said yesterday at practice.
Word spread quickly after the Stars parted ways with Avery, 13 days after the forward made disparaging comments about his ex-girlfriends who are currently dating other NHLers.
Avery will continue to collect his $3.85 million (all figures U.S.) salary this season, but won't return to hockey until the Stars find a suitable place for him to play – after he completes his league-mandated anger management counselling.
No one has publicly commented on what Avery's future holds, but in private, there is widespread condemnation in the NHL, leading to the belief Avery's chances of playing again in the NHL are slim.
While no one knows what the future holds for Avery, Mayers said he expects there is an NHL team willing to give him a second chance.
"If he asks for forgiveness, that, and time, will probably get him another chance," Mayers said.
Avery's chances ran out in Dallas yesterday, after co-GM Brett Hull announced the Stars' intention to "move on" without the forward.
The NHLPA is expected to conduct their normal conference call with player reps today, and Avery's situation will almost certainly be a topic on the agenda.
"Obviously we as players are going to support all players and make sure they are treated fairly," Leafs rep Matt Stajan said. "Things were said that shouldn't have been said, and that's happened a number of times ... but I don't think we've seen the last of Sean Avery, he's a good player and he'll be back in the league."
In private, though, some Leafs wondered if anger management counselling was appropriate for Avery because they believe his repeated exchanges with players and fans, were pre-meditated and not anger related.

This is where the difference between Anger Solutions and anger management can be made clear. Anger Management implies that Avery has issues controlling his temper or his behaviour. Anger Solutions operates on the assumption that whatever Avery has done or said is a function of his choice. He may not like the way things are going - and he may well have "anger issues"; however, the way he has expressed his ideas to the media are most certainly pre-meditated (responses to feelings of anger are not always spontaneous, thoughtless acts - they are often, if not always, pre-meditated).
My thinking is that from an Anger Solutions perspective, Sean Avery would not only learn how to safely and appropriately express his anger, but he would also have a new decision making model to help him discern which responses will net him the best outcomes. I'm sure, that with hindsight being 20/20, if he had known that spouting off about his ex-girlfriends to the media would get him kicked off his team and perhaps out of the league, he would have kept his mouth shut. Anger Solutions would have taught him how to see that freight train coming before it hit him square between the eyes and knocked him out the game - perhaps permanently.
Interested to know how we would accomplish that? Call us at 1-866-754-6169 or visit our website: www.angersolution.com.