Attitude is
Where It All
Begins
When you think about stress management,
what do you think of? Do you picture hammocks, white sandy beaches, and azure
blue oceans? Do you think of soothing music, candles, and a hot bath in a
claw-foot tub overflowing with bubbles? Or perhaps you are picturing yourself
laying on a plush leather couch while you free-associate about your
childhood. While the above strategies
may prove useful to reducing your stress, I would like to begin with the
simplest of concepts; one that is essential to managing one’s stress.
Many have heard me say, “Belief is the
basis of action. Your behaviour will always be in accordance with your
beliefs.” This is as true for stress as
it is for any other aspect of our lives.
Richard Lazarus, one of the first to coin the word “stress”, described
it as a feeling or state that occurs when the perceived demands on one’s life
(whether emotional, social, financial, intellectual, etc.) exceed the resources
one has available. In other words, if
you don’t think (or believe) that you can handle the demands currently placed
upon you, you will experience stress.
While stress may express itself through
physiological cues, it is a total experience, encompassing mind, body, and
spirit. Thus, stress must be combated on
all of those levels. The first of these
battlegrounds is that of the mind, as that is where stress begins. It begins
with your perceptions, and the choices you make in dealing with them. If you choose to believe that your situation
is hopeless, your mind will stop seeking for answers and go into survival mode.
Your body will assume the physiological state of fight or flight, causing a
rise in heart rate and blood pressure, an excessive production of blood sugar
and cholesterol, and an increase in the production of cortisol, norepinephrine,
and serotonin.
All of these physical responses can wreak
havoc on the body if left unchecked. Too
often though, we tend to try to resolve what is happening in the body without
first addressing what is taking place on the battlefield of the mind. You must first adjust your attitude if you
wish to successfully keep your stress levels in check.
Am I saying that one should not be
justified in feeling alarmed when a crisis comes up? Absolutely not. It is a natural response to feel a little
overwhelmed from time to time when crises arise in our lives. However, how you respond to the crisis in
your mind will, in the end, determine your overall ability to cope with
it.
A negative attitude will invariably gnaw
away at your capability to fight, to seek answers or solutions, and to prevail
against the presenting challenge. By
remaining solution focused, you can train your brain to look for the positive
aspects of the current challenge. You
will be able to look back on previous crises in your life, and draw on the
strength of knowing that you were able to survive it, and perhaps even take
from some of the skills you used in the last situation to help you through this
one.
It has been said that the mind is a
terrible thing to waste. Indeed, the
mind is a powerful tool, when used correctly.
By asking yourself key questions, you can train your mind to work for
you rather than against you in the battle for optimum stress. Here are some questions you can use to help
you train your brain to develop positive attitudes:
1.
What’s
good about this?
2.
What
can I learn from this?
3.
How
can this situation help me become stronger?
4.
Who
has been through something similar that I can call on for help or advice?
5.
What
skills or resources do I have that I can use to help me in this situation?
6.
How
can I become a better person as a result of this crisis?
Begin carefully asking yourself these
questions so that you can prepare your brain with a positive attitude to help
you deal effectively with each stress-inducing situation as it arises. Remember
that the only time you will not experience stress is when you are dead. We will
always experience some stress because it shows that we are growing, learning,
developing, and evolving; the question is whether or not it will be mobilizing
or optimum stress, or whether it will be the consuming kind. Maintaining a
positive attitude, one that seeks to find the good in each situation, and looks
for ways to learn from each challenge, will propel you towards a state of optimum
stress. Whenever stressful challenges arise, remember, attitude is where it all
begins.
Do you like what you see here? For more on practical stress management strategies, get the book: When the Last Straw Falls: 30 Ways to Keep Stress from Breaking Your Back
