Wednesday, June 16, 2010

What You See is What You Get

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Have you ever been in a near crash? I have. I have also gone all the way and totally smashed up my vehicle. There have been times driving in icy winter weather that all I could do was take my foot off the gas, and let go of the wheel, and HOPE that my car would set itself right. Sometimes the more you struggle, the more damage you cause. What you resist persists.

Long ago I heard a statement that totally resonated with me – and this was long before the “law of attraction” was a hip buzzword. The statement is this: “What you focus on is what you achieve”. The Rev. Beckwith of “The Secret” fame puts it this way, “Energy flows where the attention goes.” Let’s examine what that looks like in practice, sticking with the driving analogy.

Tony Robbins tells the tale of his adventures in learning how to drive race cars. As he was getting in to do a few practice runs, the instructor told him specifically NOT to look at the wall, especially if the car began to lose control. Sure enough, Tony recounts that as he began to circle the track, he lost control of the vehicle and saw the wall come spinning towards him – and although he could hear the instructor’s words in his mind, he could NOT take his eyes of the wall as it loomed dangerously closer and closer. Sure enough, he crashed into the wall.

Second try – again, as he took the corner, the car begin to spin. He could hear it… “Do not look at the wall…” Still, he could not shift his focus, and before you could say, “oops I’m going to crash”, he was once again, kissing the wall with his race car.

Third try – the mantra was rolling through his mind as he got behind the wheel. Better still, rather than telling himself NOT to look at the wall, Tony gave his mind new instructions: “Keep your eyes on the road!” So as he began his third practice run around the track and the car begin to feel like it was spinning out of control, rather than focusing his attention on the wall, he redirected it to the road. Surprisingly, he was able to maintain control of the vehicle, and keep it on the track!

Is this result really so surprising? I think not. Consider your bad days. What are you focused on? Are you thinking about how beautiful the world is or are you dwelling on all the things in your life that are going wrong? On good days, are you wandering around looking for reasons to complain, or are you setting your sights on all that is right in your world. Contrary to popular belief, happiness is not based on the things around you, but it is a state of mind. What you focus on is what you achieve. If you focus your thoughts on what is negative, you will achieve a state of negativity. Likewise, if you focus your thoughts on what is good, and feelings of positivity, that is what you will perpetuate in your life.

The same is true for anger. There are lots of things going on in the world that could contribute to feelings of anger – things beyond our comprehension or our control. Children being murdered by their parents and siblings; oil spilling into the ocean at rates so alarming we cannot fathom the ecological damage; David Beckham losing out on his opportunity to play in the World Cup… so much to be angry about!

Seriously folks: what you focus on is what you will achieve. If you focus on negativity, don’t be surprised when all you experience is a STATE of negativity! Rather than focusing on what gets your ire up, direct your attention to how you can generate solutions to those challenges in your life. And if the situation is completely out of your control, let go of the wheel, and relax. Things will straighten out on their own.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Anger Lady on CTS Television: Overcoming Obstacles

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Watch this most recent appearance of Julie Christiansen (a.k.a. The Anger Lady) on CTS TV's "On the Line" - this nationally broadcast call-in show always gets lots of calls and promises engaging conversation every time. Enjoy!
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