80 Days - Did You Make Them Count?

2008 has whirled by, it seems... although, when I look back on the events of the past year, I marvel that I was able to accomplish so much in 12 short months. As the 80-Day Challenge winds to a close, I want to share with you the secrets that made these feats of goal attainment possible - in the hopes that you will soon be able to make the same kinds of strides, and on a consistent basis. So here is my short list of success boosters and some key nuggets of wisdom to go along with each item on the list:

1. Great mentors. I had the awesome privilege of meeting and working with some amazing people who mentored me through the process of creating positive, lasting change in my own life: Gerry Visca, Jack Canfield, Paul Copcutt, Lisa Nichols, Richard Elmes, and John Assaraf. I must also credit my pastors, Ken Pollard and Steve Barber for their positive influence on both my spiritual and business growth. Now mentors are great - coaches are wonderful. But their advice only works if you IMPLEMENT it. Lesson learned: Knowledge acquired is useless unless it is APPLIED.


2. A wonderful support system. There were times during this last 12 month period when I felt completely lost. Despite the help of great mentors and a clear vision of my goals, my emotional baggage often got in the way of me doing what was necessary to realize my own success. Now, remember my mom passed away in February of 2007 and I did not grieve for her all at once - in fact, I think I did my grieving in spurts - that is until about December of last year, when it all came to a head. The work that I had to do emotionally as fallout from my mom's passing took time and the support of good friends. You know as well as I do, that any kind of emotional self-work takes time and support. So my thanks go out to my family, my husband Steve, my children (Cayla, Dylan and Thomas), Tom Caswell, Sandi Harmer, Tracey Turavani, Ivana Frajdenfeld, Shane Flannagan, Christine Eaton, and many others, who held my hand, made me laugh, prayed for me, reassured me, and even kicked my butt - always just at the right time. Lesson learned: It is OK to ask for help. When we turn people away in our time of need, we teach them to NOT help us. Vulnerability is not a sign of weakness. It took me a long time to learn that - hopefully, you'll take my word for it.


3. An accountability network. Much like a support system, an accountability network is invaluable if you want to achieve success. Accountability buddies remind you of the things you said you would do, and make a point of asking you if you followed through. They help you to stay on track and in so doing, are your partners in success. My accountability network includes Lisa Nichols, my Rise and Shine Coach, my husband Steve, Carolyn Hoxie (thanks again, Carolyn!), Tom Caswell, and Tracey Turavani. You all have played a very valuable role in the successes that were achieved this year! Lesson learned: No matter how self-directed you are - it still helps to have someone to be accountable to. Without accountability it is too easy to slack off, to do something easier, to skip the tough stuff, and to just give up when the going gets tough. Even the best in the world have coaches - why shouldn't we?


4. The last success booster I want to list here is my journal. Those of you who know me well know that I carry a journal with me everywhere I go. Notes from my meetings go in there. Rough records of my coaching sessions go in there too. Appointment dates and times; my crazy ideas - and the not so crazy ones; my brainstorming ideas, and my hopes and dreams all go into my journal. When I get a great idea, I jot it down. Sometimes it goes no further than that, and then other times, that fleeting notion becomes the next big thing for my business or for my personal life. Lesson learned: If your life is worth living - it is worth recording! I once heard it said that a dream is a wish until you write it down - then it is a goal. Write stuff down! Follow through on some of those great ideas - who knows where they might take you?

Just this year, I have begun sharing more of my goals with others - I used to keep them locked in a vault. I have found that sharing my dreams and goals with others inspires them to dream as well. Another great side effect of sharing my goals is that people have enlisted to help me achieve my dreams - no strings attached - just because they want to be inspired and to have a part in accomplishing something great. To me, that is true inspiration, and I am grateful for the opportunity to enable others to fulfill their personal aspirations as we travel this road together. Part of this incredible journey has led to the formation of a new company - one which I believe will continue to promote the values and principles that have been presented by BRC for the last 11 years. I also expect this new company to be the vehicle by which Anger Solutions and our family of exceptional life changing programs will be carried not just across Canada, but to the world. More on this will be revealed in the New Year, but suffice it to say that I am excited about the days to come and the strides we will continue to make in 2009.

What about you? Do you have some emotional self-work you know needs doing, but you need a little help? Are you in need of an accountabilty partner to give you a swift kick in the pants every now and again? Consider joining the first 2009 TransformED Coaching class starting Jan. 5th for 8 weeks. You can find out more by visiting our website: http://www.angersolution.com/transformed.php. This is an incredible way to start the year - especially if you have been sticking with the 80 Day Challenge so far - with gathered momentum to propel you into 2009 - so you can hit the ground running.

As this year and our current 80 Day Challenge both wind down to a close, my wish for you is your continued success in life, love, faith, health, and wealth.

Is Sean Avery Angry or Just Rude?

This Just In from Mark Zwolinski SPORTS REPORTER for the Toronto Star:
Even if the Dallas Stars aren't ready to pardon Sean Avery for his behaviour, there are those in the NHL who are slightly more sympathetic.
"North America is all about forgiveness. If you ask, if he (Avery) asks, he'll be back in the NHL," Leafs winger Jamal Mayers said yesterday at practice.
Word spread quickly after the Stars parted ways with Avery, 13 days after the forward made disparaging comments about his ex-girlfriends who are currently dating other NHLers.
Avery will continue to collect his $3.85 million (all figures U.S.) salary this season, but won't return to hockey until the Stars find a suitable place for him to play – after he completes his league-mandated anger management counselling.
No one has publicly commented on what Avery's future holds, but in private, there is widespread condemnation in the NHL, leading to the belief Avery's chances of playing again in the NHL are slim.
While no one knows what the future holds for Avery, Mayers said he expects there is an NHL team willing to give him a second chance.
"If he asks for forgiveness, that, and time, will probably get him another chance," Mayers said.
Avery's chances ran out in Dallas yesterday, after co-GM Brett Hull announced the Stars' intention to "move on" without the forward.
The NHLPA is expected to conduct their normal conference call with player reps today, and Avery's situation will almost certainly be a topic on the agenda.
"Obviously we as players are going to support all players and make sure they are treated fairly," Leafs rep Matt Stajan said. "Things were said that shouldn't have been said, and that's happened a number of times ... but I don't think we've seen the last of Sean Avery, he's a good player and he'll be back in the league."
In private, though, some Leafs wondered if anger management counselling was appropriate for Avery because they believe his repeated exchanges with players and fans, were pre-meditated and not anger related.

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This is where the difference between Anger Solutions and anger management can be made clear. Anger Management implies that Avery has issues controlling his temper or his behaviour. Anger Solutions operates on the assumption that whatever Avery has done or said is a function of his choice. He may not like the way things are going - and he may well have "anger issues"; however, the way he has expressed his ideas to the media are most certainly pre-meditated (responses to feelings of anger are not always spontaneous, thoughtless acts - they are often, if not always, pre-meditated).
My thinking is that from an Anger Solutions perspective, Sean Avery would not only learn how to safely and appropriately express his anger, but he would also have a new decision making model to help him discern which responses will net him the best outcomes. I'm sure, that with hindsight being 20/20, if he had known that spouting off about his ex-girlfriends to the media would get him kicked off his team and perhaps out of the league, he would have kept his mouth shut. Anger Solutions would have taught him how to see that freight train coming before it hit him square between the eyes and knocked him out the game - perhaps permanently.
Interested to know how we would accomplish that? Call us at 1-866-754-6169 or visit our website: www.angersolution.com.

28 Days Left - The Final Push in the 80 Day Challenge

I'm curious to know how many of you have been sticking with the 80-Day Challenge that I started with you at the beginning of October. We are quickly winding down, and I have another installment in the process to help you continue to build momentum as we approach January 1st, 2009.

But first a review:
Our very first exercise came to us courtesy of Mark Victor Hansen, co-author of the Chicken Soup for the Soul Series as well as several other great works including The Aladdin Factor ( a must read for anyone wanting to set and achieve goals). You will remember that this exercise was about finding your "YOU ARE HERE" dot for your life. You asked yourself some key questions: what did achieve in 2008? Are you healthier? Happier? Wealthier? Wiser? What challenges were you still facing at the time of doing that exercise? What about now? Have you faced and overcome any of those challenges during this process? Have you created any wins for yourself over the last 60 days? What situations still exist in your life that you know you need to address in order to move forward?

Our second exercise was from the brilliant Morgana Rae, and focused on your relationship with money. What did you learn about yourself and your limiting beliefs around money? Have you re-defined what your relationship with money will be like from now on? Have you decided to make money a welcome visitor in your home - perhaps one that will take up residence in your business on a more permanent basis?

Our third lesson in the 80-Day Challenge focused on The Law of Seed and Harvest - and provided you with some tips on how to make the most of the time, energy, and money that you invest into your life or your business. What seeds have you decided to plant? What "gardens" are you currently nurturing, and what kind of fruit will they yield in the harvest? Have you begun thinking about the natural growing seasons in your life, and how you can make the best of the time you have to work with? Remember that the Law of Seed and Harvest relates to all aspects of our lives: work, love, family, pets, money, business, health, spirituality and faith. Nothing happens "instantly". You need to build skills to get that good job. You need to be willing to love and be loved in order for romance to blossom. Kids don't grow up overnight although it seems that way sometimes. Pets need to be trained and acclimatized to your family's routines. Money must be invested in order for it to grow. Businesses all start somewhere - none of them become overnight successes - there was work, planning, and investment of time, energy, and money long before the success came. If you want to be healthy, you have to sow good seeds - if you sow rotten seeds (drugs, alcohol, junk food, nicotine, etc.), you will reap a rotten harvest. And of course with spirituality and faith - to develop a relationship with your creator also takes time and attention on your part. Nothing comes from nothing - you have to plant, water, and nurture the seeds for the harvest you hope to reap.

That brought us to our T quadrant in the most recent lesson: Taking Stock. This is about isolating where exactly you want to plant those seeds as you move forward either in your career, job, or business. I have always believed that one should do what one loves, and the money will follow. I still think this is true. However, I have recently re-framed that concept - if we do what we love by following a proven SYSTEM, and sticking with the PLAN, the money will not only follow, it will FLOW. The Law of Seed and Harvest is about following a universal system that will lead to a harvest every time. The T quadrant is about clarifying your vision so that you can plan ahead to do more of what you really love - the stuff that is FUN and makes you money.

Where do we go from here?
With only 20 something days left in the challenge, it is time to move into action steps. By now you should have a clear concept of what you want to accomplish (work wise) in 2009. You have re-framed your ideas about money, and you know what challenges you are currently facing. You understand that you need to plant something in order to reap a harvest, and that what you plant matters. So I have TWO assignments for you to follow through on in order to get yourself moving into action.

First: Make a list of the things you want to accomplish in 2009. Break your list down into categories -
Work
Love/Family
Money
Business
Health
Spirituality and faith
Intellectual/Education
Community/Legacy

Now - Narrow your focus down to the first 90-120 days of 2009. Which of these goals must you begin working on immediately if you are to reach your major milestones by the end of the year? What seeds must you plant, and how long will it take for them to convert into a viable harvest? For example: if you want to find true love, what steps must you take NOW in order to be able to say, "Happy New Year Honey!" to your dream lover on Dec. 31st 2009? If you want to land that "whale" account for your company, who do you need to contact? How will you build the relationship with that potential customer? What limiting beliefs must you shed in order to make this desired goal a reality?

Lastly - make a list of action steps you can begin within the next 20 - 28 days so that when 2009 rolls around, you will already be on your way to materializing the vision you just described through the goal setting process.

I can't wait to hear from you! Please feel free to post you comments on this site, or email me directly with your results. There will be one final installment in this 80-Day Challenge - the wrap-up. Look for it closer to the end of the month.